Friday Night

July 13, 2019

 

 

 

Welcome back to another day in my life. I am flattered that you find it so interesting and entertaining! I guess on the outside it is interesting and entertaining. On the inside, well I can’t really say it sucks, but it definitely has its challenges and low points. 

 

As I sit here and clean the pizza grease off my keyboard at 10:30 PM on a Friday night after a 13 hour work day to ensure I get my thoughts out… it really is kind of amusing honestly. 

 

Yes I ate Dandy Mini Mart Pizza for dinner tonight. Only the top though, because… Keto AF. 

Okay fine I ate some of the crust. Whatever, judge me. I have been appointed queen of the IDGAF club. In my defense I spent the entirety of my week serving others through food, food service and therapy and at the end of the day I am too tired to serve myself. So, insert pizza. 

 

Anyway, I was telling you about the excitement of my Friday nights these days. Tonight has been one for the books. (Err I mean blog.)

 

I had no intention of sharing this day or writing another entry for a while, but on my way home tonight after my LOOOONGGG day finishing out a LOOONGGGG week to only have a LOOOOOOOONGERRR week ahead with exactly 0 days off I couldn’t help but laugh at my mission at 9:15 PM. 

 

So, I have my very first solo place of residence which I love and am super proud of. Yes it took 30 years, but I am finally #adulting. (At least I am doing my best to make a really good attempt at it.) ((I am a late bloomer by default, obviously)) 

 

I love my apartment. I have scraped and puzzle pieced it together. Nothing matches, everything is hand me downs and it's basically like I am back in college but without the 3 room mate best friends. It’s just me and Brutus against the world. I don’t have to walk on eggshells. I don’t have to do the dishes right away if I don’t want to, I can play whatever music I feel like, I can leave my shit everywhere… and there isn't a single person who can tell me how to live my life. It’s fucking great. It can be lonely, but I am not too far away from people all the time. Which is good for me. I need to be near people and things. When I isolate and become stagnant is when that door to rock bottoms basement becomes visible. So busy Brittany near people but living alone is GREAT. 

 

My point in telling you all of that is to also inform you that I do not have washer and dryer hookups in this life venue I have going on right now. Which is FINE. I am totally cool with it and am very fortunate to have a loving father who lets me do my laundry once a week. (Because you will never catch my ass in a laundromat) The difficult part of this busy life I lead is that I have to carve out time to make my way to the woods for an afternoon to get my laundry done. So sometimes I have to get really creative. 

 

Which leads me to my night. My very exciting night. 

After working a very busy day at my day job and coming straight to waitress until 8:00 PM I had a grave realization that I had NO CLEAN UNDERWEAR. None. And, well tomorrow (Saturday) I  would be a 10-12 hour day in the kitchen cooking, prepping, packing, invoicing B&B Fit Meals and Sunday I cook and then have a mastermind to host… and then Monday I will be leaving at 4:30 AM to go cook at a girl scout camp all day. Tuesday and Wednesday I work at the hospital… Thursday and Friday Girl Scout Camp…. You get where I am going here? THIS IS BAD NEWS BEARS! BAD! NEWS! BEARS! 

 

And I’m not one of those girls who can go commando. Never have been, Nope. Can’t. ESPECIALLY IN THE SUMMER. 

 

I remember one time in high school a bunch of my friends decided to have a “Commando Day” and I just couldn’t do it. I lied and said I was but truthfully I was wearing panties the whole time.

 

So anyway, I got done mopping the diner and realized I had to go buy underwear or else I was screwed. Mind you, I am tired and bitchy and just want to drink a beer or 6. But, I gather myself into my jeep renegade and make my way to the nearest open affordable store for underwear on a Friday night at 9:30 PM. 

 

Kmart. 

 

Yes, my Friday night excitement was going to Kmart to buy enough underwear to get me through until next Sunday when I could find a pocket of time to get my laundry done. (And by that time it will be my entire wardrobe.) 

 

Then I started to panic because I thought: “Oh God, what about all my other clothes?! I don’t have enough clothes to get me through another week and I certainly don’t have the means to go buy a week's worth of clothes! FML!!!”

 

I walked out of the store and chuckled to myself about the “problems” that I had to deal with. 

 

Then, I became very quiet and grateful because damn, what I had been taking for granted. 

 

There was a time when I used to sleep in Kmart / Walmart / McDonalds parking lots with my mom. There was a time I stole potted meat and 88 cent rolls from walmart so we had something to eat. There was a time I ate chewed gum out from under a table in a public place because I was so hungry. There was a time when I didn’t do any laundry for 2 years and wore soiled ratty clothes because there just wasn’t enough money to do a load at the laundromat. There was a time when I used to search parking lots for enough change to purchase something out of a vending machine to split between the two of us. Sometimes I would get lucky and find enough for two things and a can of generic soda to split. That was food for us for two days, sometimes 3. 

 

Guys, I can remember the first new outfit that my first foster mother bought me at a walmart in Pensacola Florida in 2001 after child protective services had found me. It was the first new clothes that I had in years. To put on a fresh set of new clothes after taking a hot shower…. There was no greater feeling. I felt like a legitimate superstar. 

 

So my point is here, someone, somewhere is out there praying for the problems that I face. I was once a little girl who prayed for food, and a shower and new clothes. So, I totally get it. 

 

I don’t share these things with you for pity, but I do share them to make you think. Sometimes we don’t know how good we have it. Sometimes we take things for granted and if they were gone, we would be in a very bad way. 

 

Tonight, I am grateful for the pizza grease and my $1 underwear from Kmart. Because you know what, little 13 year old Brittany would have literally committed a felony to have a piece of pizza and a new pair of undies. 

 

I kind of have to jolt myself back into reality sometimes. It’s so easy to get caught up in the “mainstream” “First World Problems”. We are all human. We all do it. But, sometimes I forget where I have been and it knocks me to my knees and many large crocodile tears when I am reminded. 

 

To end on a lighter note, I hope you found my Friday night entertaining. I surely did. Shortly thereafter I returned home from said store, I took Brutus out to go potty and was chased by a skunk while he was mid poop. I am telling you, I can’t make this shit up. 

 

 

 

Until next time friends,

 

Xo

 

Brittany, SWF

 

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